Friday, April 28, 2006

The Bearded Series

The Bearded Pig - smallest torso and largest head of all pigs.

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I now bring you "The Bearded Singer" - smallest torso and largest head of all singers.

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and "The Bearded Actress" - smallest torso and largest head of all actresses.

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I'm not saying they have beards, just that their heads are really friggin' big.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Special Features 2

Well, it's time for another sneak peek at some of the special features that you'll get when you join my exclusive blog club.

For example, did you know I interviewed Jack Van Impe? Here's a preview!

Also, witness the exact moment that my book club (see sidebar) was born!

And finally, watch me actually write blog posts!

Don't delay, join now!

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

3 things

I went to see Elbow at the Opera House last night. Damn, they were awesome. If Elbow is ever in town, I recommend that you go. Trust me.

I got an oil change etc. and I hadn't been since July (because, really, how often do you really NEED to change your oil? I'd say if they're telling you 3 months or 5000km, it's really at least twice that, AT LEAST.) Anyways, I couldn't admit to the guy that I hadn't changed the oil in 9 months, yet I don't have a problem telling the dental hygienist that I don't floss. What's up with that?

Finally, I joined the Running Room's Triathlon clinic. That's right, knock another one of those New Year's resolutions off the list (last year's list). Next stop, Iron Man.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Tiger Woods is a spaz...

Well, it appears that Tiger offended some people by saying that he putted like a spaz. You'd think that he'd know better, being the public eye and all. What a retard.

People are too damn sensitive. Give him a break, it's not like he clubbing seals or anything.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006


The problem is that I have nothing to write. I'm having, how you say, a lapse in creativity. Is it possible that after 2 years I have nothing more to contribute to the blogging world? I don't want to bore you with the menial details of my day, as that's not why I blog. Anyways, I feel 'bad' when I don't update for a long time because I'd hate to lose one of the 10 people who read this, but, what can you do? Maybe I'll start writing poetry.

when I consider the children
starving in africa
it makes me happy
because i'm not them.

Now, I'll tell you why this poem is great.
1) I didn't feel the need for capitalization or punctuation
2) I didn't feel the need to make it rhyme
3) It really makes you think.

That's a quick lesson in poetry for you. It's like taking a picture in black and white. It's a quick and easy way to disguise crap to make it look something other than crap.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

It has been 2 years.

I forgot my blog's birthday/anniversary. It was last week. Now it's not talking to me and it's not being funny anymore. Stupid blog.