Thursday, June 29, 2006

Happy Canada Day.

I think it's time that time went to the metric system. Distance is measured in meters, and other distances in multiples and submultiples of 10 (centimeters and kilometers). Temperature is as well. Water boils at 100 degrees Celcius and freezes at 0, and you have 100 degrees in between. Volume is the same. You have litres, millitres etc. Time, on the other hand, has weird units, like hours and minutes. How many hours in a day? If you were thinking metric, you'd expect a muliple, (or submultiple) of 10, but you'd be wrong. There are 24 hours in a day, and minutes and seconds are equally messed up. So, what I'm proposing, (just to keep everyone on their toes) is to introduce a new unit of time (equal to 24 hours) called the "Day". Minutes and seconds become obsolete, and you get millidays and centidays, kilodays etc.

How would this change life, you may ask? Well, instead of tv shows starting at 4:30, for example, they'd start at 0.6875 (because 4:30 is 16.5 hours into a day, I simply divided 16.5/24 to convert to metric.) You could still say, "4:30", and most people would know what you were talking about, but they'd shake their heads at your inability to let go of the past an embrace the future. The only problem with this (that I can think of) would be that, say, the United States refused to use metric time, and everyone else converted. Then figuring out what time Friends is on would require a calculator.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Hey, hey, hey...

I feel sorry for morbidly obese people, especially the ones who are obese due to circumstances beyond their control. If there existed a button I could press that would cure them, I would press it. I might even go so far as to walk across a room in order to press it. Not a big room though, that's more than I'd be willing to do. I'd walk across a moderately sized room in order to press a button that would relieve someone of their obesity. That's how selfless I am. Actually, reflecting on this post, maybe the button pressing is more for my benefit, as opposed to theirs. If they weren't obese, I wouldn't have to feel bad for them when I saw them, and then I'd feel better. I guess them not being obese would be a happy side-effect of me making myself feel better. That wouldn't make me too selfless at all, would it?

On a similar note, Tim Hortons has decided to thank us by offering some free swims during the summer! Yay! Thanks for sending me to a crowded pool full of screaming children splashing around getting in my way when I'm trying to swim laps. I have an idea Tim Hortons, why not give me something that I want, like a free cup of tea or 25% off a soup and sandwich deal?? Or, better yet, why not thank me by getting my damn order right?? Thanks for nothing, jerk-asses.

Monday, June 19, 2006

Fake Story about Made Up Kids IV

"Dad", said the boy, "Why is the sky blue?"

"Well", I said, "It has something to do with diffraction of light, or was it refraction of light? And the blue light isn't scattered as much as the rest of the spectrum, or is it scattered more? Don't ask me", I said, "I don't have a degree in physics!"

"Yes you do", said the boy.

"Oh yeah, I do", I said, "I do..."

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Why I don't like Soccer

It's boring. A ridiculously one sided soccer match ends up with a score of 1-0. That's one goal, and a lot of kicking a ball around for 90+ minutes.

Soccer players run around on grass with shin guards on, then when they fall, they roll around for a while like they've been shot. Anyone who has ever fallen on grass (ie. everyone) will tell you that it doesn't hurt. Getting kicked in the shin when you're wearing shin guards? Doesn't hurt. Goalies dive around on the grass and take balls off the face (hee hee) and they don't roll around in agony. What's the difference? There isn't any, thus proving that soccer players are pansies. Plus, these are elite athletes we're talking about. Maybe if it were a field full of senior citizens I could accept people getting hurt when they fall down.

Soccer fans are obnoxious. I'm not really sure I can add anything to that.

I think there are more reasons, but I can't think of them, and I'm tired. I'm sorry my blog has sucked recently, but there has been a lot of soccer to watch, and watching soccer just drains me because it's so dumb.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Photo Contest

There is a photo contest to take pictures of wildlife in and around the location where I work. I thought I'd participate, and I've taken a few pictures. I'm not sure they're contest winners, but I still have a few weeks (just maybe not the patience). Anyways, I was looking for some opinions in the minipoll. (Click photos to enlarge)

Number 1Number 2Number 3

Number 4Number 5Number 6

Maybe I'll go back to take some more...