Tuesday, March 28, 2006

New? I don't think so...

Since when did taking something out of something make it 'new'?

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They just took the damn bacon out! Plus, since when were 2 free downloads a selling point? I get all the free downloads I want, and I don't have to buy "Pep-and-Baconless" Pizza Pops (but I do anyways).

Here's another "new" product that just seems to be new packaging.

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They say it's EXTREME but it basically tastes like any other Excel gum. I did notice that what they are probably trying to pass off as electricity (it is called VOLTAGE afterall) looks a bit like sperm. Now there's an idea for a new product - Sperm gum!

Sugar Free Excel Ejaculate - For that right after a blow job feeling.

I have a few more ideas for 'new' products too. This is basically "Coke" but, taking a page from the Pillsbury book of new products, I've taken out the syrup and sugar. I call this, "New Coke Light".

And I think this is a real winner as well. Man, I'm just full of winning ideas.

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