Tuesday, December 20, 2005

KING KONG (No Spoilers, although everyone knows what happens at the end)

How can a movie that has dinosaurs fighting a giant ape while an attractive woman prances around in rags be hard to sit through? Ask Peter Jackson and hopefully he'll answer you in under 3 hours.

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Here's an example of a bad scene where the woman breaks up with Kong:

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Girl - "Kong, we're just from 2 different worlds. I'm from the real world and you're from that crazy world with the dinosaurs and such."

Kong - "Yeah, you're right, but the sex sure was good."

Girl - "Yeah, I'm a little sore though..."

Kong - "You should have said something! Just because I'm a giant ape doesn't mean we can't communicate!"

Girl - "Well, it kinda does... Plus, you're not a real King either. Instead of being a Queen, I'd just be that weird chick with the giant ape. Where's the glamour??"

Kong - "Can I eat you yet?"

Girl - "No Kong, not yet."

(I may have made up that last part, but my ass was so sore from sitting on those damn seats for 3.5 hours (including previews etc.) that I may not have been paying too close attention at the end.)

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