Saturday, March 05, 2005

Paul's Book Club (Not to be confused with Oprah's)

Don't read a book today!
This is a little different than Oprah's club. I haven't read this book, nor do I plan on ever reading it. Join my club (take my button), don't read this book!

Book 1:
Where's the damn whale??

First problem with this book - what's missing from the cover? Oh, I don't know, maybe some crazy big albino whale? It's about a whale, not some boring old ship (I think, I haven't read it). Ship = dull, psycho whale = cool. How am I supposed to accurately judge a book by its cover if the cover isn't somewhat relevant to the content?

Further problems with this book are sentences like this:

"We saw young Leviathan amours in the deep1"
Who the hell is Ishmael?

1 - The sperm whale, as with all other species of the Leviathan, but unlike most other fish, breeds indifferently at all seasons; after a gestation which may probably be set down at nine months, producing but one at a time; though in some few known instances giving birth to an Esau and Jacob; 272

272 - Esau and Jacob twins born to Isaac and Rebecca; see Genesis 25:24.

Genesis 25:24 - I'm not looking that up.

Any sentence that takes that much effort to understand is too much like work, and I don't want to work in my free time. PLUS, since when were whales fish? If Herman Melville didn't know that whales were mammals, then I don't really want to know what else he 'knew' about them.

Anyways, book #1 in my club is Moby Dick. Join the club, don't read it!

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